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Monthly Archives: April 2009

Yesterday i made reference to my paranoid tendency. I have not really thought that much about it before i wrote it. It is a place i don’t like to go. A violence that has been left over for years. and i am glad you stayed tuned long enough to hear it.
mompage411the sour thing is I want to write thing like that. I want to push into those realms i have not been able to walk. Not able in words, i should say , the mind teeming in what insanity is does. we all have these references, these inside thoughts, long ago i thought of the idea. to touch what is the ugly . what is the reality and how does that change the changing fore it only takes a suggestion. a notification of such happening. the using of a reasoning felt,, for which without embarrassment , we should be able to approach , as we would call this the pre-enlightened age. thing that are just outside of really feeling. they come as disturbances in the force, and define a way of interaction but jar intuition jam its frequency and determine out side of us.

“ a knight and a night did battle
a days of daze followed. “
For all the nobility of thought and reason. we are bound to the documentation of feelings.
but there in that, , Walking is a mater of
how you see”
all life is creation. Be that a return to roman classics, then further the conversation with enactment. with acceptance, mean the god man first cares he is god man, life is the futility of civilizations merit systems, only a quiet day to let birds in . lets light shine. the ability to aee hear, feel that and every dawn is heaven. While responsibility doesn’t first become, no magical powers except maybe empathy, no guessing the lottery number for materialism are only so. All higher life is without.
self actualization are the hardest. and so it has been quitting this and that for years. now. and never really knowing where i stand with all of it. The quasi visions excesses off an imagination and a willing head to be intoxicated with character , the charm inside knowing the unequal able feeling of being. especially when you need the dream for survival.
oh and looking without timed arrivals or earned percentages. a wholeness is just breathing. i know because of the separation of my spirit from loving family. from whence love comes. Said with a smile and a question.
greased are the wheels that envision love as energy.
Geared in the religion, faith , and science of symmetry.
timeless like a heavens god ability to learn
moving conscious to individuality
as equality.
your hopes mine and beyond
the meaning of unity.
the gifts of the sound.

you can tell or not? I have been reading a tourist guide to Europe. it is funny how western man writes about western man. the great “give away”s to a height more unifying, less cluttered more mechanical but less uneven,
it is funny to thing that the pleasure of the people is a consideration of governments, i don’t hear it. i hear how we have to much , and spend air to get more, then bind that air with more air, until the emperor has his new cloths.
it is a land of want and make believe, heaven, again,, lol.
and a waste to think we are not a part of it. our hands read to the coals of repudiated Armageddon. Leaking into the NEXT conspiracy, the next documentation of crowd control. when there are to many on the top. or even getting to touch the Sistine chapel ,on your back, with a spatula.
It is funny to read of the evolution of society through the guide pages, the quaking and adjustments time takes in human years. like the next is here to be for it is natural.
like the nobility of spirit and response is the present day ability to participate for the greatness of our own society, in the long years of history, our flouncing in the hay, our masturbation with a rhythm line has ended, the great wall of what goes on while you aren’t looking sets in. the meaning to be the next evolution or after decay comes balance, again. and again. but with our future minds we fight the last of the old school. the non adaptive, a god in heaven but not of all.
we are not speaking entities of the energy of being .
or we are..
and from there look around again. and see change and difference, we see how to cure ourselves of disease with simplicity,
but such is the reason to collapse all. to sell a bad check, to fiance a losing mine.
incorporate the remaining dissenters.
or kick them out of heaven,
except we are remembered
we are accepted.
some where. and with each village
a smile exchange is a unity
a moment of eternal
energy. forever in the grasps
of knowing one.
like a science preceding peace.

So again a day to remember and forget. like a dreams is so registered. The Absent whole in the ways of love and flesh. a musician ,, a title, of the hour of discipline and the elements of laziness associated. a bring down to the carpenters hand, a let down to the managerial family, so obtuse element spent against the better merriment of family and home.
so you wanta be a rock star.
drivin in a big car.
far away.
the element of want.. no i do not. avoidance i feel the selling of a self same mercy of being. a tide that creates tide, my jelly fish approaches to sure. and you got it. the goings on of many years telling me telling me, and yet i do it like the crying makes me.
i do it like the pain of the street creates in the soul left behind as others cross the grounds to ultimate, on trees hung by highways.
i do it like the day i completed with a dream of what was and look for the inspiration of what is, the left over of truth a “you” makes it of. the ideals of gods. with the dementia of greed and a bar owner will be the first of the devils with the pen. and the first with nothing and you are a moment to fill time between.
my weakness is my negativity, a weakness inherited from the earth and all assortments of staged welfare. you looking out for the truth not to get you so caught up in the reality of the million hour wasted on one misspoken dialogue. Talking to your self promotes.
all angles, the beauty of a moment of recognition is enough for me to go . the pale diminished vacation of reason, that that you have loved without you. haven’t. for what is a love to dreaming.
what is a man who glamorizes himself, to avoid what reality would see of him.. for not many see a him should he carry a guitar it is placement and unseen struggles and a uncared for reality.
Check the gear, all good, but the mike already has a dent from being in the jam room.
i don’t get mad, i don’t get, just anything, it is a fact of wanting and not being able to cover all bases.. amp .. is cool. have extra batteries. cover all bases. the song. ?? did two. right two. / don’t know. it is getting sunny out under light gray clouds. my weakness is my negativity and irony’s mercy.
Wh st a passing grout do i say, music is like the youth thing. like a never noticed thing. but the squeaky voice has a saying so right with the thought of musical need fulfilled. they have liked it. they the public. the girlfriends, the friends. the know one in the crowd on a warm summer night. to lover who for my cup to fill have only to listen and respond with change. but just for you i sing then. for none else, i guess. that is there on street in Europe waiting as the moment is right for the crowds to get out of the train and you play as they leave and the crowd covers you from the police while you play, or in Boston playing as the station builds up, and all along they wait with you, singing and right as the train can be heard they move. slowly so as not to really be noticed as this is just a passing moment yet of what they live for. to escape with you into music
they like a moment of them and that hope is going to change everything.
for me ,, this is another day. and yet , i wanted to scribble. like some invention was going to come from this sets of type.

lol.. the afternoon meeting is with the eighties, trash man and why waste. The interesting thing is that the plot is around an east coast American Irish dumpster owner. who is all talk when he gets into the world. then melo’s as trauma happens. The west coast feels like people don’t acknowledge traumatic commonness, a shared involvement. ,
maybe it is me just going crazy walking around the all the “determined” faces to live in California, A State Dream,, it is just an observation. to deny trauma is to deny community. but you have to say hello to each other to solve it. But what we get is guarded versions of “this is mine and that is yours” with cold hands and large people.
I ,of course, am scared of large people. I have to admit it. I can not control what they do. and am paranoid of them the misguided versions of reason they produce cause few have ever told them they are wrong. Large people should never be involved in art. I know this is wrong so please don’t quote me. but i am ill to think of the amount of people that are devoid of art in any degree and yet making the choices of what art is. There is an ill-relevance with power. I have been crazy enough to think of myself as scared and reacted to it. I know a little Tai Chi and learned cause i was always scared of Big people. A major flaw in my character, i don’t limit it to just large people but also large attitudes also. my negative voice always sparks up when i am analyzing a new character. which is when ever i met someone. the excess of an abused child and the mental training of a life on and off the streets. for which you might have caught up with that through the other pages that come with this one. I don’t do it on purpose and when i did construction and residential moving i works with some of the largest people i ever met. but i was in charge a lot so it didn’t bother me. but my bosses i always thought would hit me. A violent off shoot i control with my own reminders.. I have to reminding myself it is a left over. but the stress is terrible as i didn’t even know what stress was until not to long ago. we aren’t uncaught up to our technology, or i just grew up in Pa. and that is what they don’t teach. in many schools and a reason for my writing it.
Coming through the East Coast Boston new york we get to think everyone knows these terms. but do we know what they feel like. can we tell the place from which a feeling comes from or why. it is a long game of discovering of love and separating dis-satisfaction out into self created or the “left overs” like i like to describe them, or just a world problem. Like Ignorance, prejudice, mis-guided , or criminally directed Discretion and non committal power structures.
like know much can you get done with the phone on, ringing about college loans. the next huge L and S. eventually. something next to blame it on. it the crash to have the collection before there is an advancement of technology. computers was the one that got away I think, unless gates and his brother in apple ware are clones or tank raised. and of course i would love to hear who owns Google. public domain.
so all this

the attitudes you repeat cause you saw it and learned it. but beyond animal we are but not much, but beyond is why we create works that can not be scared away, or tempted into the values for which promote with cash. I am a songwriter. no matter if you pay me or not.

I am feeling the not working thing. I am telling myself i can write , and have for many years, and yet to write i feel a drag also.
Years and years go into one being ,, The distant memory that accumulate in your mind separated into what you see, the fact of perspectives, but when are perspectives ..,
And small people should all learn tai-chi. or atleast play hakysak. mompage09

April fools , day, 2009
Yes the station of misanthropic adventures last well into the night of haunting. i can not see going into it. i sit and stare into the television screen looking for the meaning of the media. portrayed , how it has to do with me. Me as a material being.
for which you would not think of on you own, the million that have come before, from the druids to bio physic ians , from every believer in God, and every church going person. Composes around the ideas of non body interaction in the discovery of faith as a natural sense. A physiologically balancing sense for which understands the greater good as the science of out of body health and human relaxation. The common sense of love and God, the precast definitions of astrology and Gravitational waves.
the subject of neutrinos and the idea of focus through mediation. (prayer as mentioned through out the great books. but yet overlooked. as we separate out what we like and don’t.
i am not thinking of what to say, as in all is fiction. and what with a writers mind i approach the raw. and determined plant-ish being we use to save our souls.
in that the reverse of trauma, in that the hope and science to back it. in that, a self centered to global universal beings which live in the hope and representative government. Liberty is the freedom to know Peace. With world and future. peace with hope toward the pains. commonly shared, that cannot be so economically divided, your fence affects mine, and in that we must create dialogue, and of course it is the perception of fence , that creates a hurtle. so we agree on fence.
until we must create a different view as sky is presented.
shared are and shared are. agreed.
peace is knowing that the advancements not only make it to market but create market through incentives. it is the change of money into the next wave for which corporations are slow to acknowledge seeing as their inventiveness fades with time.
we can now see the trend well enough and must leak everyone of money so that, the few again empower the next definition changing.
collect your coins and run.
solar panels, off the grid housing . in all new development. is coming.
place well on the roulette wheel.
keep that thought i have to go to a blood draw.. lol. mompage02
A poem

by k.a.ambrose

I have few minutes to go.
Jetting out of house and beyond
the escape for money
to something is not
a joy, the dark sky
the infinite suggestion
each sight creates
fling against stories
cause i am to un-listen.
i am
mine outshining
mine that asks for peace
staring and the rock

But oh to the neon signs,
blaring noise of city streets
crowded and true
human, awash with what it avoids
walking down the street
and i drive,
missing a million more
of neighborhood
the fine cut lawn the trim
a bush hedged against the house.
seeking closeness
only for told in heaven,
where caring isn’t cost
over rides.
and political nano-tides
where inventing cloned human,
is a question, where world
development comes to the cross roads
as all days had been previous,
and never a day separates,
crossed roads,
without the perfection of being at angles
curves arches and alike.
A way or another, simple seperations mar
A battle of words not intentions,
Such to stare at the rock.

It is flesh which reaches for the over soul.
Thinkin in just two roads.